Posts Tagged ‘young’

I can never forget my first


He is etched on my heart and soul

From when I was innocent and untouched

Not yet soiled by society

Still naive and hopeful

Passionate and creative

Dreaming of a bright future

But then I was ripped from my fantasies

Stripped bare

Raped by medicine and doctors and diagnoses

I was a virgin penetrated by traumas

It was painful

I didn’t belong

I longed to escape from my cage

And so I burned my Self to the ground

Resurrecting and liberating myself

On the ninth day

My first love never came to me

He never held me

Nor did he touch me

All I had was his words

Brief glimpses of his voice that I have since forgotten

And photos

Eleven years have passed

I am now married and living abroad

He is engaged to another

Yet we are closer than before

Nothing will ever happen that could compromise our evolved lives

But I do hope that one day our bodies will someday stand in the presence of one another

And our souls will greet one another

With love, light, happiness, and peace

Because out of that tumultuous time

Came a Phoenix

She has been reborn on several occasions

Over the years

Yet there is still the innocent dreamer

Hidden beneath the ashes


Read Full Post »

(Here are more dreams from young Jenna!)

February 3, 2000:

I dreamt that I was at school, and we did our normal things that we usually do every morning. Then it was time for our bee on the Southeast States and Capitals. I got sick in the middle of it.


February 13, 2000:

(I made a note that I was 19 in this dream. I dreamt this at age 9.)

I dreamt that we had a family reunion at my house. We also invited good friends of ours. When we were waiting outside a car drove up. A woman came outside and a 20 year-old boy that looked a lot like Lance. I just stared there at the boy and then I fainted. The boy and his mom rushed to my side (so did my mom). My mom could not carry me inside so the boy did. He carried me all the way to my bed. Everyone then went downstairs except the boy. He knew a way to wake me up. He kissed me. I did wake up. I asked him why he kissed me, and he said he kissed me because he loved me the moment he saw me. I said that I did too. When we went downstairs we walked close to each other. When it was bedtime the boy had nowhere to sleep, so I let him sleep in my bed with me. He was delighted to. While we were in bed, he told me that he was really Lance from NSYNC, and he was madly in love with me. I said I was too. The next day Lance asked my parents if he could take me horseback riding. They said yes. We went horseback riding. At the end he kissed me. We had many adventures together. In the end, we married.


November 6, 2000:

My class was doing a class trip to this one museum. It was pretty boring. Then we came across a sign. “The chute and chair flight that was under construction is now open!” My friends and I went up the stairs. My brother was ahead of me. We came to the front then. We went up this little ramp, but there wasn’t any air power to shoot you out. My brother went and did it. When he landed on the chair, I heard a voice call to him. “Where’s your sister? I have to talk to her.” I called down, “I’m coming!” So I flew down and landed gracefully on the chair. I saw a cute boy looking at me in a surprised look. “That was so cool! I wouldn’t be able to do that!” As I was coming down, he caught me. “That was beautiful! You’re beautiful!” He kissed me.


(I sure was a romantic, even back 13 years ago!)

Read Full Post »


(I think I wrote this poem when I was in 6th grade. I found it in a little poetry portfolio in one of my middle school folders. That would date this either 2001 or 2002.)


Observant, calm, intuitive,

Sister of J.T. and daughter of John and Nancy,

Lover of mornings that are filled with serenity, books that lure you into their pages, and her admirable family,

Who feels content when curled up under her warm cozy sheets, dejected if sorrowful news reaches her ears, and blissful when it seems that luck is on her side,

Who needs privacy, an unending supply of books, and honorable friends,

Who gives thoughtful advice, her attention to whoever’s speaking, and companionship,

Who fears suffering, the end of something that should last forever, and loneliness,

Who would like to see peace between all countries, Orlando Bloom in person, and the end of hateful words and gossip,

Resident of St. Charles, Missouri,


I was 7 in this picture, not 11 or 12 when I wrote this poem, but I thought I would share a picture of younger me anyway.

I was 7 in this picture, not 11 or 12 when I wrote this poem, but I thought I would share a picture of younger me anyway.


❤ Me

Read Full Post »

(Hello everyone! It’s been a while I know! My life has been more busy lately, and just last weekend I had a birthday extravaganza! My birthday was last Saturday, April 13th. I had quite a fantastic time, and already this new year of life for me is off to a pretty great start! There are daunting aspects as well, but c’est la vie.

I wanted to share a few dreams that I recorded in my dream journal when I was a lot younger, in case you were interested in delving into the fascinating subconscious mind of a younger me.)


August 2, 1999:

I was near a castle when the guards found me. They put me in a peanut butter jar. Then they put me in the kitchen. The Prince came in the kitchen because he was hungry. He almost ate me. Other people came in and almost ate me.


August 3, 1999:

I was in college. After a while, I could choose my career. I could be a singer, writer, or a actress. I couldn’t decide. Then I asked if I could do all of them. They said I could do one at a time.


August 4, 1999:

I was an ice skater and so was Tara from my school. We had to find out who was better. The winner got to spend a vacation with Tara Lipinski. When Tara was up, she scored 7.9’s only. When I was up, I scored all 9.9’s. I was the winner.


August 26, 1999:

I dreamt that I went to Aunt Cindy’s house. My mom was there too. We had lots of fun. Uncle Gary was not there. One day we went to a concert. We saw NSYNC. We were up front. Lance was always standing and looking at me. Then we went home and went to bed. The next day, it was time to go. So I packed. When I was in the car I checked my things. When suddenly, “I forgot my bra!!!!!!”


October 10, 1999:

I dreamt that we got a cd order form in the mail. We did not know but JT ordered some. Then they came in the mail. We were surprised. He ordered a Britney Spears for me!

Read Full Post »

November 7, 1997:


I like the bus. Somtimes it’s noisy, but I think the people on the bus are crazy. Most of the people are nice. The people I don’t like are: Gary and Chris.

(I remember Gary threatened to climb up to my window, cut the glass with a knife and come into my room. I told my parents, and my dad talked to his dad. Apparently, he liked me. That’s a creepy way to express admiration, I’ll tell you that!)

A Boring Day

Today is a very boring day.

The goose would never lay.

When I lost my sock,

It gave me a shock.

Today is a very boring day.

But now it’s a very happy day.

To: Dad

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I love you more than an ice cold brew.

February 6, 1998:

If I were…

If I were president I would make new laws, make sure all the animals are safe, and nobody hurts other people. If I were a whale I would watch for whaleing ships, try not to get myself beached, or watch for nets. If I were a book, I would like it when people read me, and I want people to take care of me. I don’t like it when people rip my pages. If I were a book I would be a chapter book.

February 7, 1998:


When I go to sleep I sometimes hear my Daddy snore. When my grandparents come I stay in JT’s room (like right now). I like sleeping.


When I wake up I see the light of day. My mom sometimes wakes me up or I wake up myself. Sometimes we eat late and sometimes early.

❤ Me

Read Full Post »

(I have so many journals of when I was younger! I found another one, and this one was when I was 7 1/2 years old!)


The Wind

I like the wind. I like the way it blows in my hair. It feels cold. The more I feel it the more I feel cold. I can feel the wind now.

All About Apples

Apples start out as a seed. I’m going apple picking. There’s all kinds of apples. I like apples.

Franklin the turtle

Once my brother and my mom found a baby turtle. So they picked him out and put him in a box. When I came home from my friend’s house he showed me the turtle. We named him Franklin. He was cute. He was still for awile but after that he walked alot. Then we had to let him go. When I was in bed I was worried about Franklin. It was morning now and I asked my mom if we could look for Franklin again. It was raining. So we went to find him. At first we couldn’t find him but then mom spotted him. So we picked him up and put him in the box again. A couple months later we found out that Nicky the (neighbor’s) dog ate him.

(We later found out that he was a baby alligator snapping turtle! We spotted a bigger one at a little creek near the glen by the woods in my house. This was before they chopped all of the trees down to build a road by my house.)

November 7, 1997:

Today when I came in the classroom everybody was working on their Daily Edit Test. Then we did our spelling test. I’m done with it now and I hope I get everything right! We went for a bathroom break. Then I worked in my reading workbook. I got the Abc order right! Then we sat in a circle on the floor and read the story: A Turkey for Thanksgiving. Then we did a book report on it. After that is was time for lunch. At recess Resha and I played that we were princesses and one day we got lost. And then Resha found our way back. Then the bell rang and we lined up. When we got in we went into Mrs. Hawkins room for a movie. It was called Runaway Ralph. When we came out we went to P.E. When we came back, then we washed our hands. Our teacher told us that there will be a tornado drill, and we can’t go by any windows. After that we finished our oral book reports. Then Mrs. Hawkins class came to our class and watched a play. Then we packed and stacked. After that we lined up. Now we are on the bus. I did get the spelling test right!

❤ Me

Read Full Post »