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Posts Tagged ‘sadness’

I can never forget my first

Love

He is etched on my heart and soul

From when I was innocent and untouched

Not yet soiled by society

Still naive and hopeful

Passionate and creative

Dreaming of a bright future

But then I was ripped from my fantasies

Stripped bare

Raped by medicine and doctors and diagnoses

I was a virgin penetrated by traumas

It was painful

I didn’t belong

I longed to escape from my cage

And so I burned my Self to the ground

Resurrecting and liberating myself

On the ninth day

My first love never came to me

He never held me

Nor did he touch me

All I had was his words

Brief glimpses of his voice that I have since forgotten

And photos

Eleven years have passed

I am now married and living abroad

He is engaged to another

Yet we are closer than before

Nothing will ever happen that could compromise our evolved lives

But I do hope that one day our bodies will someday stand in the presence of one another

And our souls will greet one another

With love, light, happiness, and peace

Because out of that tumultuous time

Came a Phoenix

She has been reborn on several occasions

Over the years

Yet there is still the innocent dreamer

Hidden beneath the ashes

Waiting

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Dark Waters

Swirling dark waters undulate before me

My bare feet sink into the cool, wet grass

Lightly dusted with dew and memories

 

My toes dig into the blades with slight reluctance

As if wanting to linger on the moments

But my resolve pushes me forward

 

I reach the edge of the river

Looking into its blackness I see ripples of our past

Fading in and out as scenes and seasons

 

Slowly I submerge myself in the depths

Sinking, submitting

And as I drink in the waters willingly

You begin to fade away

Until I am falling into blackness

My mind washed away with the waves

Disappearing into…

 

lethe

 

-Me

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The tears form slowly in steady droplets

Chilling as they make their way down

Her soft milky cheeks

Forming icicles

Shattering upon impact

With the earth

 

Winter approaches more quickly

On the winds of Autumn

The leaves whispering of impending

Departure

The crisp air biting at her exposed soul

 

Why can’t she take control

And decide for herself

When the seasons change

Instead of foundering at his

Deceptive mercy?

 

How is it truly love

When only one

Gets the best of both seasons

And the other is left standing

Alone at the crossroads?

 

She knows what must be done

And it will take every fiber of her being

When the time is right

She will speak for herself

 

62206947

 

-Me

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Glass House

She gazes around her glass house
Smiling at the memories
Yet you can see that it doesn’t quite reach her eyes
Instead there is sadness

The pages of letters keep arriving
But will soon collect dust
The bouquet of roses has already begun to wilt
Leaves dried
Petals fallen
His side of the bed holds the impression of his body
But it will soon grow cold

The crack in the floor of her glass house appeared weeks ago
Steadily growing and lengthening
Traveling across the room
Mirroring the steady breaking of her heart

Is she a fool for refusing to leave
While her glass house shatters?

20131011-012815.jpg

-Me

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I want time to stop

Because with each passing day

Your leaving looms near

 

62206939

 

-Me

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Fault Lines

Your words created

Fault lines on my heart. How long

Until it will break?

crackedheart

 

-Me

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Longing

Desire for love
Slowly fades away into
Longing for friendship.

Who can she so trust
That could repair her sad heart
And bring back her smile?

It will take a sweet
And compassionate dear soul
To make her happy.

20130204-183716.jpg

❤ Me

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