Posts Tagged ‘hope’

I can never forget my first


He is etched on my heart and soul

From when I was innocent and untouched

Not yet soiled by society

Still naive and hopeful

Passionate and creative

Dreaming of a bright future

But then I was ripped from my fantasies

Stripped bare

Raped by medicine and doctors and diagnoses

I was a virgin penetrated by traumas

It was painful

I didn’t belong

I longed to escape from my cage

And so I burned my Self to the ground

Resurrecting and liberating myself

On the ninth day

My first love never came to me

He never held me

Nor did he touch me

All I had was his words

Brief glimpses of his voice that I have since forgotten

And photos

Eleven years have passed

I am now married and living abroad

He is engaged to another

Yet we are closer than before

Nothing will ever happen that could compromise our evolved lives

But I do hope that one day our bodies will someday stand in the presence of one another

And our souls will greet one another

With love, light, happiness, and peace

Because out of that tumultuous time

Came a Phoenix

She has been reborn on several occasions

Over the years

Yet there is still the innocent dreamer

Hidden beneath the ashes


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I’m turning over a new leaf

Finishing this chapter

Closing it down

It’s time

I’ve spent too much time

Looking back

Reading past entries

Living in the pain

Believing it was how I was supposed

To be

Dwelling on the trauma

Won’t make it

Go away

I have no choice

Either I shed my old

Outgrown skin

Or I move forward while

Not peeking

Over my shoulder

Change is uncomfortable

I have to bare my soul

And skin

Risking new wounds

But burning this shell

Will enable me to

Emerge from the ashes


Death is the road to awe

I can flourish

I just need to



-Me 19072018

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Present’s Hope

Though our future will
Crumble as pieces of cliff
Into the vast sea

I still keep my hopes
As white winged doves close at heart
That you’ll treasure me

Love me this moment
And always in a piece of
Your heart saved for me

For the present is
Our gift to each other’s souls
In beams of gold light


❤ Me

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Going through the motions as if
Under some spell
And strange influence,
Reeling from the sense of
Detachment now present,
Every time hopeful for a
Discovery of something meaningful.


❤ Me

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(I wrote this in May 2007 for my Honors Literature & Composition class during my junior year of high school.)

No one can avoid the world of imagination. It can draw an unsuspecting person into its endless possibilities in the blink of an eye. Some seek it out as an escape from a dreary, monotonous lifestyle. Others wish to find new ways to entertain themselves. Everyone has played the fascinating game of “let’s pretend” at some point during his or her life. With the help of a creative imagination, a small patch of woods near a neighborhood can become an enchanted kingdom or a grandparent’s closet can be a cave to explore with undiscovered treasures and the possibilities of dangerous beasts. Creativity and imagination are priceless gifts that add color to life. Visualizing while reading breathes magic into the words on the pages and causes the action to appear, plunging the reader headfirst into what happens. There is no age limit to imagination; everyone is blessed with it. When analyzing the film entitled Finding Neverland from different angles such as literary and cinematic aspects, it can be proven that this film, with its celebration of friendship and imagination, will withstand the progression of time and remain a classic for generations to come.

Set in London of 1903, Finding Neverland begins with the introduction of the writer and playwright James Barrie. As of late, his works are losing appreciation from his audiences, and the owner of the theatre at which Mr. Barrie puts on his plays is anxious for a new play that will be a success and reap bountiful proceeds. On the home front, his relationship with his wife is deteriorating, as is her faith in him. Barrie seeks out relaxation and inspiration at a nearby park. One day, he meets a family of four young boys playing, their mother, Sylvia Llewellyn Davies, keeping a watchful eye over all of them. Upon spending time with them, James Barrie becomes very fond of the family and begins to spend more and more of his time with them, telling them stories and allowing their imaginations to take flight into worlds of pirates, cowboys and Indians, and many other fun scenarios. He becomes very attached to Sylvia and confides in her all of his insecurities. Together, they provide a steadfast support to one another. Throughout the time spent with the family, Mr. Barrie takes particular interest in the middle child, Peter, who is bitter towards Barrie and accuses him of attempting to take his late father’s place in the family. James Barrie only shows support and care for them all, using the delightful adventures of the boys as inspiration for his new play, in which he politely asks Peter for the use of his name for the main character. Disaster strikes as Sylvia is found to be terminally ill. She refuses to be hospitalized and is set on spending her remaining time with her sons. When she is unable to attend the opening night of James’ new play called Peter Pan, he brings the entire performance to her home and finally shows her the magical heaven of Neverland that she had been so anxious to see.

This priceless and imaginative story is based on reality and is a classic for all ages to experience. Symbolism is important and emphasized throughout. The separate and closed doors between James Barrie and his wife stand for how their marriage is being closed off and growing apart. The powerful scene in which Peter destroys his makeshift theatre symbolizes his loss of hope and trust in adulthood. Sylvia re-pasted Peter’s book of self-written stories and adventures because she wished for him to continue on being imaginative after her death. Themes prevalent throughout the film are many wonderful messages including the ever important: don’t grow up too fast. Also a strong theme is one which states that an open heart and imagination can help take the pain away from troubles or illness. Spending the remainder of her time with her sons and Mr. Barrie helped Sylvia transcend her terrible condition and find the beauty of a vivid imagination. This film truly helps put the faith back into people’s lives and should be considered timeless throughout the ages.

The acting portrayal and cinematic aspects enhanced the film, making the storyline all the more wonderful. Johnny Depp’s interpretation of James Barrie was inspiring and highly believable. His facial expressions truly helped viewers see his inner-child and playfulness. It was interesting how Mr. Barrie seemed more uncomfortable and ill at ease around adults whereas, around children, he brought out his true colors and love of life’s adventures and magical possibilities. His voice was very effective when carrying out the emotional intensity of scenes, especially when he confided in Sylvia of the time when his older brother died and he himself so desperately vied for his mother’s attention and fondness. It was also then that he introduced Sylvia to the world of Neverland. The low tones and soft lilt of his subtle Scottish accent brought special life to his character. An extremely difficult scene to act out must have been when Peter Davies, played by Freddie Highmore, destroyed his theatre and vented his anger over how every adult was deceiving him, causing him to lose his faith and trust in adulthood.

Camera angles and music selections were also priceless assets in creating this timeless film. The scenery of the park, fields, country cottage, and Neverland were absolutely breathtaking along with the chosen views from the audience’s standpoint. At Peter Pan’s opening night, the soaring of the camera demonstrated Peter’s realization and enjoyment of the play. Visual effects such as the scene on the pirate ship and the circus helped enhance Barrie’s imagination and creativity. After the scene in which Sylvia was exploring Neverland, there was a fade-out that showed the end of her life. Also, the end of the film had a fade to white to demonstrate the bright hope and future to come. Furthermore, the music helped enhance the mood and would crescendo with excitement. A boy’s choir sang throughout, promoting childlike innocence and playfulness. It helped the viewer be transported into the magical world of James Barrie’s imagination. At times, there was no music playing in the background to place emphasis rather on dialogue and movement than an orchestra. Every aspect of this film was a treasure to cinema, enabling this movie to be a beloved classic for years to come.

The doors to the world of imagination are never closed. They are always open and ready for a visit at any time. Creativity should never be hindered or oppressed, for in creativity there is character and growth. Individuality is shaped and molded by a healthy imagination. Keep faith strong and always keep the child inside alive.


finding neverland

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A Special Place

You’ve nestled into a special place
In my heart
That no one else can reach

That special place
Has been empty for quite some time
And I didn’t know if it would re-ignite

Yet here it has
Yawning, stretching
Opening wider each day
As if waking from a long slumbering dream
Filled with hands grasping at impossible ideals
Trying to force what isn’t there
And giving false name to a different identity

My special place
Grows stronger every day
With fondness and tenderness
Hope and faith
Trust and patience
In you
Of you
With you

Although the chasm of time and distance is wide
We meet in my special place
Sharing our dreams, stories, and worlds
Slowly and steadily merging them as one
As I hope and pray that someday may truly happen

You’ve nestled into a special place
In my heart
That no one else can reach


❤ Me

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(I wrote this July 2007 for a summer literature assignment for my AP Literature and Composition class my senior year of high school.)

Success is fed upon by encouragement, hope, and complete faith. Most accomplished people have someone supporting them every single step of the way, in times both happy and sad. A mother supports her daughter as she makes the pivotal transition from middle to high school. Coaches are sources of criticism and leadership that help shape their players. Behind every rebellion, there is one particular face or voice that stands out above the crowd and is particularly remembered for the contributions and sacrifices that he or she made to the movement. This is true in the case of the Dominican rebellion against Trujillo that took place in the mid-to-late twentieth century. All four Mirabal sisters are known as Las Mariposas, or “The Butterflies” who were dedicated to fighting to end the reign of terror and murder occurring in their midst, but it was Minerva who was the true heart and spirit of the resistance. Her entire life was filled with eye-opening incidents that helped shape her firm beliefs, impacting not only her future but also the intertwined destinies of everyone around her.

Minerva Mirabal is the perfect example of bravery and boldness. From a very young age, she was not afraid to outwardly express her distaste in depression and defiant attitude to advocate equality and freedom. People would take notice and smile at her passionate appeals. Once, she attempted to free a caged rabbit and grew angry and frustrated because she cowered in fear yet refused to leave her imprisonment. “[Minerva] was the one hurting her, insisting she be free” (Alvarez 11). This is symbolic for in the future, her assertive persuasions for others around her to join her cause of rebellion sometimes led to reluctance and doubt that it could truly be achieved. Minerva’s life, especially her early years, was filled with many dramatic occurrences that fueled her spirit in the revolution.

From the moment she began schooling, the daring Mirabal sister expressed distaste in control from a higher power. However, being so young and representing her family’s values, she used polite brazenness in order to maintain a good image. She befriended a girl her own age named Sinita and insisted that she could have a bed next to her, breaking the customary alphabetized seating arrangements. The two, along with two other girls, became inseparable, sharing intimate secrets with each other. One night, Sinita revealed the bloody secret of her past, describing how Trujillo had her male family members murdered. It was this revelation that caused Minerva to doubt the immaculate image of her country’s leader advertised in all the history textbooks and all across the land. If she had not reached out to make a lonely girl feel welcome, her involvement in the Dominican resistance and heroism might never have taken place.

Many years later, Minerva had a highly unsettling encounter with “El Jefe” himself that caused resentment and pain to not only herself but to her family as well. On the night of the Discovery Day Dance, the Mirabal family was invited to a party hosted by Trujillo himself. Upon their arrival, Minerva was whisked off to the head table where she uncomfortably sat and watched the Dominican tyrant flirt with and fondle various women. Later, on the dance floor, she was required to dance with the loathsome leader himself. He made vulgar advancements publicly, despite her attempt at resistance. In the heat of the moment, she found herself slapping him in the face. Eventually, that unwise action and the discovery of hidden letters from a correspondent defiant in the underground movement to overthrow Trujillo, Minerva and her family were forced to suffer at the hands of the merciless leader. Her father was imprisoned and drastically lost his health. Minerva was nearly forced to give herself to Trujillo for at least one night in the attempt to barter her father’s release but luckily was able to stall long enough for him to finally be freed. After a time, the father of the four strong sisters passed away. There was a time where Minerva even blamed herself. Her dangerous encounter with Trujillo caused her desire for rebellion to be even more deeply rooted in her heart and soul.

Unfortunately, it is all too often that people lose their lives fighting for the causes they believe in. Minerva and her sisters Patria and Maria Theresa were dragged from their cars on November 25, 1960 and beaten to death along with their driver. Even while she was imprisoned for her beliefs and principles, she continued to ignite hope with her fellow inmates. When she refused to give up her crucifix that she was wearing around her neck, it took several guards in order to wrestle her away in order to be contained. Her strength and desire for change was a source of hope and inspiration for the entire nation. It was the death of Minerva Mirabal, freedom fighter for every Dominican, that gave birth to the wonderful gift of freedom.

minerva mirabal


❤ Me

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